howling at the moon

Laying on the grass with a girl I’m trying to love

she’s so difficult to love, such a paradox of a person

Always a little bit lost, never really knowing what’s real and not

what the truth is and not, always in a constant state of confusion

A little afraid of everything

she’s looking for a type of love only I can give her, no one else

                         A love that’s colossal, never ending, unconditional and soft, very, very soft

We lay there in silence, she doesn’t want to listen to me make any more promises that I can’t keep

she’s so demanding

she wants me to take her places and places, try new things, learn

she wants me to run out of my comfort zone and never go back,

but I love it there, it makes me feel safe, at home

she can’t breathe there,

It takes the air out of her lungs and it slows down her heart, she wastes away there

I’m scared out of my mind but I’ll give in to her demands

she assures me  that she’ll always be there, she’ll be with me every step of the way, she’ll never leave me hanging mid-air, she’ll always be by my side, supplying me with all the soft love and words that I need to take that step into the unknown, I’m afraid of everything, calmed and reassured only by the sound of her voice.

We lay on the grass, watching moon come alive as the sky turns black

we blew off all our friendships to sit and howl at the moon together

we sit there in silence, smiling, watching the stars appear and disappear

but all a passer-by will see, is a girl, laying on the grass all  by herself smiling at the stars.